From the Mouths of Babes

Laura (while helping Mommy make Gooey Butter Cake): "Mommy, can I stir the GOO?"

Laura: "I'm REALLY good at 'thinking about it'."  (When they get in trouble at daycare, they are often told to go sit and "think about it."

Laura: "I'm 3 now.  I will wash my OWN hands."
Mommy: "OK, go wash your hands then."
Laura: "Mommy, you're supposed to help me!"

Laura (who wanted Goldfish for a snack):  "Mommy, God wouldn't have made Goldfish if he didn't want me to eat them."

 

Laura (while taking a bath): "I was going to play cards with the pretend kids in the bathtub."

 

Laura (very sternly, after we said she was funny): "I'm not funny, I have a name!  My name doesn't start with funny.  My name starts with Laura."

At daycare, the kids were getting ready to go play outdoors on a winter day.  Laura began digging through the coat bin looking for a coat.  Cheryl is the daycare provider.

Cheryl: Laura, your coat is in your cubby.
Laura: Yeah, but my coat is SOOOOO boring.

 

 

Laura, getting ready to climb into bed for the night: "This disaster needs to be picked up." (referring to the mess in her room)

 

 

Laura, having gotten out of bed (again): "I have a growing pain.  I ate a lot of cheese and broccoli for dinner, and I grew too much!"

 

 

Laura, getting ready to watch an episode of The Backyardigans: "Mommy, I can't watch 'Robot Rampage.'  It's too robotty.
Erica: "But you just watched WALL-E last night.  That's ALL robots."
Laura: "No, Mommy, there are people.  They're fat."

 

 

Laura, playing with plastic food: "Oh, crap."
Andy: "Laura, what did you just say?"
Laura: "Oh, crap."
Andy: "Why did you say that word?"
Laura: "Because I lost my tomato."

 

 

Laura, looking at the frozen beef brisket thawing on the counter: "It's good to know there's chicken under the ice."
Erica: "Laura, that's beef, not chicken."
Laura: "No mommy, it's chicken."
Erica: "I didn't know chickens got that big, Laura."
Laura: "You're not going to the right chicken store."

 

 

Early one Saturday morning....
John: "Come on Laura, wake up Daddy!"
Laura: "No, Johnny, he's not a morning person like we are."

 

 

First thing in the morning on Mommy's birthday:
Daddy: "Johnny, today is Mommy's birthday.  Say 'happy birthday' to Mommy."
John: "It's not her birthday.  I don't see cake."

 

 

Overheard in the bathtub one evening:
John: "Mommy!  MOMMY!  LAURA HIT MY PEE-PEE PARTS!"

 

 

John, upon wandering into our bedroom and discovering Erica changing clothes: "Why you naked, Mommy?  I not naked.  Why you naked?"

 

 

While driving John to daycare one morning in November, at the height of deer season and shortly after seeing 4 deer cross the road in front of us:
John:  "Daddy!  Deer!"
Daddy:  "Yes, John.  4 deer.  Keep your eyes open in case you see more.  We don't want to hit them with the truck.  You know what happens if we do?"
John:  "We knock them over?"

 

 

Cheryl was going to take the daycare to Oakland Pool one day.
John: "Daddy, we're going to Oakland Pool today!"
Daddy: "Wow, that's great!  I wish I could go too.  Can I go with you?"
John:  "No, Daddy.  You're too big.  You can't fit in Miss Cheryl's van."

 

 

While getting ready to go for a walk with the kids riding their bikes:
John: "Daddy, I'm going to get an engine on my bike!"
Daddy: "You're not getting an engine on your bike."
John: "No, I mean tomorrow!"

 

 

John (to Laura): "Chocolate chip cookies are always made with the chocolate chips in them, right Laura?"

 

 

John: "Mommy, you have to stop saying I am a mini-version of Daddy. My name is JOHN! He is ANDY! That means I am not a mini version of Daddy. We don't have the same name."

 

John: "Ow, my weenie! I shocked my weenie!"

Laura: "I only pooped in church!" (age 13)